Winning In Life Is Not The Same As Competing
Winning in life doesn’t mean climbing podiums or winning gold medals in the Olympics. Believe it or not, life is not a competition and it is not always necessary to always be number one to be happy.
There is no need to compare yourself to those around you or put yourself to the test to prove that you meet the requirements. You can achieve authentic well-being by working hard and believing in yourself and what you do.
Adults enjoy teaching children the need to compete. “Whoever finishes his homework first can go to the playground.” “Whoever gets the best grades gets a reward.” There always seems to be a need to be better than others in order to win a reward.
All individuals have a natural capacity for effort and desire to achieve certain goals. But you have to work for what you want and give the best of yourself.
The problem, however, is that many always feel the need to compete with others. In a way, they strive to beat other people and have an edge over them. These situations are quite common and sometimes expose people to indefinable damage. Let’s learn a little more about this topic.
Winning in life is conquering happiness
Many people live their lives competitively with everyone around them. They have to have the best job, the best car, the most beautiful Christmas tree and the most original birthday party. It’s a popularity contest, as if the defining characteristic of life is to be in a better position than the rest of the world.
However, there is something very clear in all of this. All who see their lives through this filter will constantly experience a single sensation: frustration. It is safe to say that they will never be completely satisfied. At the end of the day, there is always someone who is better at something than you. In short, the need to compete and be better than others leads to meaningless suffering.
Winning in life should consist of overcoming a healthy kind of happiness. Happiness where everything revolves around surpassing yourself, setting goals and testing yourself to achieve them.
However, many people have spent decades applying what ecologists describe as “the principle of competitive exclusion.” In other words, constantly challenging each other so that only the most advantaged stand out above the rest.
However, this is changing. In this increasingly interconnected and globalized world, new social dynamics and, above all, urgent needs are emerging. Now more than ever, it is a priority to structure a more cooperative and less competitive life to solve the many challenges ahead.
Why are some people so obsessed with competing?
We’ve spent a lot of time adopting a competitive approach in many of our social environments. We do it because it was (and is) the only way to, for example, get a job, a place to live and get attention/respect from a certain group.
But some people are so competitive by nature that they can’t see things in a friendly way. What is the reason for this?
It is often due to low self-esteem. For them, winning in life means being able to feel superior. As a result, they get an ego boost and weapon against their insecurities. On the other hand, they avoid getting involved in collaborative tasks because it is of no use to them at all.
At other times, these people are very focused on envy. They are almost obsessed with getting exactly what the people around them have. However, they never celebrate the achievements of others.
Finally, it is important to keep in mind that many highly competitive people tend to have narcissistic traits. These people don’t mind hurting others to put themselves first. For them, “beating” their opponent is perfectly fine and normal, as long as they win.
Winning in life is all about working together
If you want to win in life, challenge yourself. Do not covet what other people have. Remember that you don’t need to step on other people to be relevant. In the long run, you live your life for others instead of for yourself. Seeing life as a non-stop competition is synonymous with suffering.
On the other hand, if you compete with yourself, everything will be different. If you put yourself as a reference and set goals and challenges, you will feel more motivated and the reward will be a thousand times more satisfying. Little by little you will learn that your own happiness is the most important.
It’s also just as important to remember that it’s time to create collaborative scenarios. In other words, it is essential to think about other people’s views, ideas and actions. Stop competing to build alliances. Instead, make sure you can move on and create a better future with others.
