Why Do People Decide To Have Children Or Not To Have Children?
Until recently, most people usually assumed that everyone wanted to get married and have children. But this has changed in a drastic way. Because in the western world the number of people who choose not to have children is increasing. There are many men and women who cannot have children or choose not to have children.
The reason may just be a personal choice. However, it can also come from the idea that bringing new life into the world throws the world’s societies and ecosystems out of balance. But whatever the reason, it is clear that there is less and less taboo surrounding this decision. This also applies to almost all airlines around the world.
As a result, we see in the demographics that the most developed countries show an increasing ratio of old people to young people.
In some countries, the birth rate is even much lower than it was twenty years ago. In addition, life expectancy has also increased. Together, these two phenomena result in an aging population. Is this a good thing? Is the decision not to have children a logically responsible decision? Or is it just another form of modern egoism?
The decision not to have children
Many people believe that having children takes away their freedom and complicates their lives. Because parenting requires an amount of time that many people are not willing to invest. For these people, having and raising a child is also stifling. Besides, they don’t really care. Some people believe that having a career and a social life is enough to give meaning to their lives. For others, the investment in responsible parenting that having children requires isn’t worth it.
According to a study Childlessness in Europe (2015), most reasons for not having children are related to work. But there are also many other reasons, such as economic arguments. Other possible reasons include a poor relationship history with one’s own parents and the fear of transmitting a genetic disease.
Another study by the Family Federation of Finland shows that in recent years economic difficulties have become the main reason for not having children. Job insecurity and doubts about the future have caused the spread of this phenomenon.
As for who is happier, the University of Western Ontario in Canada has concluded that there is no conclusive answer. It also seems to depend on the age of the person. In younger people, having children is more likely to be associated with lower levels of happiness. People in their thirties have a neutral view of having children. For those over forty, having children is a great source of happiness.
Children or no children: a decision influenced by many factors
There is no one-size-fits-all answer to the question of why someone doesn’t want to have children or does. Every person, and especially every couple, has to make this decision for themselves. It is important that people think deeply about this issue. It is also important that you are sure of your decision. When people have children without wanting them, it can have really devastating effects. On the other hand, if you suppress your desire to be a parent, it will eventually create a huge existential void within you.
Almost never are people in the perfect situation to have children. The ideal is to have a stable partner, enough money, a lot of free time and a strong desire to be a parent. But it is very rare that all these factors are present at the same time. However, that does not mean that it is impossible to make arrangements and adjustments so that you can welcome a new life into the world. People actually make these adjustments all the time. Not so long ago, large families were common. They were able to survive with fewer resources.
Know why you want children
It is important that you know where the desire to have children comes from. Because sometimes the origin of this wish is not right. There are many partners who have relationship problems and deceive themselves into thinking that a child will improve their relationship or end the fights. There are also people who feel frustrated with their own lives. They then want to have children to accomplish what they have failed to make up for. Both cases are possible recipes for failure.
We are gaining more and more freedom to make decisions about who we want to start a family with and how we want our family to be. This is a huge advantage. But it also creates new feelings of fear and insecurities. The most important aspect is that you develop the ability to listen to your heart. All other things will follow from this.
Having children will always be a challenge. Bringing new life into the world is not an easy process. It means that you will be confronted with numerous social and biological challenges. You will also have to deal with the challenges that the children create themselves. But there are also countless hidden opportunities to grow and have fun with them.
