The Bravest People Know Fear Best

Spain is still recovering from the terrorist attack that took place in one of its main cities, Barcelona. The people – all residents of Barcelona, ​​even the bravest people –, despite their ideology, feel the losses and wounds as if it happened to them. They also feel fear.

Of all the posts people have started following, one caught my attention more than the other. It’s not very original, it’s repeated a lot, but it’s interesting for those reasons. It is the message that we are not afraid. Now the question is, is it true? Is this really an emotion that the locals and tourists in Barcelona do not experience in their hearts?

Even the bravest of us are scared

I’m not afraid. This motto innocently shows everything we still haven’t learned about emotions. Emotional intelligence is in vogue, it is displayed in store windows and is the title of a whole lot of articles. But we still have a long way to go before we express it in our conversations, which is ultimately the way we express how we think and feel on a daily basis.

Let’s talk about fear, because even the bravest people have it, I have it and my grandmother has it too when she tells me not to set foot in that part of town. Caution, caution, fear. Our concern that it will happen again, and fear of the unforeseen, of the inevitable, of randomness. The fear of how quickly we forget memories, of sirens or the fear that we will forget the way out of the trap, that trap that used to be a beautiful park with roses.

Let’s talk about how we don’t want to acknowledge fear, because showing our vulnerability makes us panic. And because we were taught from childhood that vulnerability is a sign of weakness. We panic when we hear fear in our inner voices, when we feel vulnerable. That’s why we’re constantly circling it and denying it. But is it really a good idea to deny our fears?

What happens when we deny our fears?

What are the consequences of denying an emotion? Primarily, the energy of this emotion comes from other emotions that we do recognize, such as anger or irritation.

As we accumulate more energy in our emotions, we lose control of our emotions. This often causes us to become unnecessarily angry at the people who we believe have done something wrong.

Something that we are responding to more these days is religion, because of its association with terrorism.

And what causes us to look skewed at all the followers of a religion? This only gives more power to those who prefer cruelty. That is, because of this, groups of people who want to create a paradise for people like them will only multiply twice as fast. Sometimes even at the cost of their own lives and the lives of those they ‘hate’.

We also often think that when we ignore our fear, we hide our courage. A courage that deserves to be rewarded at the very least through the recognition of others. Fear allows us to recognize the strength and merit of citizens who take to the streets to protest terrorism and wrongdoing. In addition, it also allows us to understand those who did not participate in these acts.

Recognizing our fear helps us understand ourselves

Recognizing fear also helps us understand ourselves and explain our fear. By denying our fear, we miss this opportunity and also run the risk of being removed from our emotions.

The concerns that a terrorist attack could happen are highly adaptive. Fear tells us, “Be careful!” Or “Something will happen, let’s be prepared.” In addition, acknowledging this allows us to empathize or connect with people who feel it too. This prevents the bravest people from feeling like they’re weird or weak, if our emotions are consistent with what happened. So maybe we shouldn’t follow those who deny how they feel.

I tell my grandmother that I understand her fear and that I am afraid too. I tell her not to worry, that I will be careful. This will make her feel more at ease because she knows that my behavior matches how we both feel. Fear is an emotion that allows us both to be the bravest of people.