Stand With Your Head Held High And Regain Your Strength

Regain your strength. Don’t hang your head. Don’t give in to something you don’t like, don’t want, or make you angry. You have a voice to talk to, a pair of eyes that refuse to look at life in fear, and a presence that requires more space. So just do it: get up. How tall you are has nothing to do with centimeters: it’s about courage, respect and determination.

Montesquieu said that in order for someone to stop abusing power, a different kind of power has to step in. It’s almost like we’re part of a power game where we’re supposed to check and test each other.

As if we have to put each other down, challenge each other and prevent each other from moving forward. It is not a peaceful world we are in. No, we live in a society that has always loved hierarchy and all the discrimination that comes with it.

It really is. If you take a moment to look at the word “power” from a psychological point of view, you’ll see that an increase in power is usually thought of as “having power over.” These are the words we come across time and again: authority, rules, coercion, fear, interdependence , and so on. In essence it is ‘B’ who imposes his will on ‘A.’

However, real power has little to do with ‘having power over’. On the other hand, it has to do with ‘authorizing yourself to.’

Do you regain strength, but how?

Not so long ago, this concept started going through some interesting and inspiring changes. Today, psychology offers us a tool called “personal strength.” Instead of power games, differences, or one group forcing another, we have something entirely new and different.

We’re talking about regaining your strength and how to do it. It means empowering yourself to achieve your goals while creating a more equal society. But to do that, you must first reclaim your confidence and your potential. Regain your strength. You have to love yourself unconditionally and eventually put your fear aside and have faith in your own abilities.

Regain your strength, learn how to say ‘no’

Now is the time to give the word “power” a new meaning. You should see it as an awakening and an awareness of what you deserve, what you can do for yourself, and no less importantly, what you can do for your world. For example, there’s a very interesting book written about this by anthropologist William Ury called “The Power of No!” Read it and think about it.

There are many contexts where a clear difference in strength can be seen. They are places where one person exerts influence and oppresses other people because of social, economic or gender-based differences.

Influence and fear

There is one thing that all these situations have in common. The person at the top of this pyramid of influence is used to always getting what he wants. You could say that life and the people around him have always said “yes and amen” to all his whims and goals.

dr. William Ury tells us that these kinds of people exert their influence through fear. So if you want to regain your strength, all you have to do is say “no” if you feel like it or if you think it’s necessary. It’s actually quite obvious. Restrict the person who has become accustomed to always getting what he wants.

But there is one more aspect to consider. It is not enough to just say ‘no’. Nothing will change if that one brave voice decides to take the step all alone. Big moves don’t happen until all the ‘no’s’ come together and raise their voices at once.

This is what we are seeing right now with the #metoo movement. Many women took a bold step at some point in their lives, but no one wanted to listen to them, let alone believe them. Now the world is listening, and these women have joined forces to put fear aside and shine a light on abuse of power that is unacceptable.

Your power is in you, wake it up

It doesn’t matter if you are a man or a woman, how old you are, or what situation you are in. You have power within you and you will be better off using it. This internal impulse should give you the ability to find your place in the world: the place you want, and no one else.

This power must be clear and creative. It should be like a flame lighting your way in moments of darkness. And it should also be powerful enough to comfort and guide other people.

Regain Your Power: Follow These Steps

Here are some things to work on if you want to regain your strength:

• Explore your identity. Define your values. Become aware of what defines you and what you just don’t want to accept.
• Explore your possibilities and potential. Also find out what your limitations are.
• Think about your position in society, what is happening around you right now and the role you have in different areas of your daily life. Do you feel that what people expect from you and what you want are in line?

• Reshape the parts of your life you don’t like. Learn how to make yourself the person you really want to be. Do it fearlessly, let go of prejudice and ignore critical voices.

Finally , you absolutely must spend time and energy every day working on your personal growth. Work on improving your self-esteem, assertiveness, and confidence. Your strength feeds on your self-assurance and your realization that you deserve better.

Only then will you refuse to bow your head again and again. Only then will you be part of this movement of respect and equality. And only then will you work towards a world that is more respectful of all its inhabitants.

Images courtesy of Hülya Özdemir.