Learn The Many Benefits Of Nonviolent Communication
It is not always easy to communicate effectively. Because there are often more assumptions and misunderstandings than clear messages and accurate interpretations. That is why Marschall Rosenberg created the empathic communication, which is also known as nonviolent communication. Here we introduce you to the benefits of nonviolent communication.
Rosenberg developed this tool to give us the necessary skills. So that we can interact with each other in a more collaborative way and in harmony with our values. It not only helps us to avoid possible conflicts and misunderstandings. But it also allows us to resolve emotional and rational disputes. With nonviolent communication we can leave the more traditional forms of communication behind. Because empathic communication aims to help us practice active listening based on mutual understanding.
Assertive Personalities
Assertiveness is the happy middle ground between passivity and aggressiveness. It is a skill that allows you to express your personal opinions, respect others and set boundaries. The psychologist Marshall Rosenberg encourages us to put it into practice and improve our relationships.
One of the most common traits of assertive people is the affection they feel for the mistakes of others. By this we mean that they do not criticize or neglect them or feel indifferent. They even embrace them and try to understand them. Therefore, assertiveness is an important aspect of nonviolent communication.
The benefits of nonviolent communication
Empathy is the ability to put yourself in someone else’s situation. It is also part of this form of communication. What is also important is the requirement of verbal and non-verbal communication, both in yourself and in others.
Empathetic communication attempts to establish a genuine relationship between the speaker and the listener. The following effects are the benefits of nonviolent communication. So learn to communicate in this way.
Satisfying Personal Relationships
Nonviolent communication relies on the concise, precise and accurate expression of a message. The aim is to improve mutual attitudes. This way of expressing oneself leaves little room for criticism and more for an effective exchange of messages.
If you share your concerns in an assertive way, you give the other person a chance to understand and share them. Marshall Rosenberg insists on the importance of making the other person a participant in the “shared hope that has failed.”
Resolving conflicts
The key to nonviolent communication is speaking from your own perspective. That way, no one can dispute what you’re conveying. That’s because the message belongs to the person expressing it. So if you want to avoid someone interpreting your message as some sort of insinuation or attack, use “I” statements such as “I have the feeling.”
We give you an example. You can say, “We agreed an hour ago, but you’re always late. You are so selfish.” Instead, try saying this: “I feel like every time you make me wait so long, I don’t feel like being with you anymore. It’s discouraging and it makes me feel helpless.”
Replace accusations and criticisms with messages about how you feel. That way, your communication won’t become so negative. You can express yourself without offending the other person. And instead of being annoyed, both of you will be able to find a solution.
Honesty
You need to know how to say “no” and how to accept a negative answer. That is the only way to be honest with yourself and with others. But to truly be a master of nonviolent communication, there is another step. You must remove any speculation or scathing communication.
This is the view of Bob Wentworth, an expert in nonviolent communication. “An observation sets the context, feelings support the connection and get us out of our heads, needs support the connection and determine what’s important, a request clarifies what kind of response you might like.” If you choose those components, you eliminate the possibility of moral judgments. We will discuss this in more detail later.
Developing listening skills and understanding
Another of the benefits of nonviolent communication is that it promotes the development of empathy. We understand empathy as the compassionate way of understanding what is happening within each of us. It means paying attention to feelings, thoughts, and judgments. It has to do with connecting with the necessities that paralyze us or cause mental blocks.
This form of communication also promotes another kind of empathy. That is the ability to understand the other person in an emotional way. It allows us to understand not only ideas and thoughts but also emotions and feelings.
Behavior that hinders nonviolent communication
So Rosenberg believes that there are many benefits of nonviolent communication. But he is also convinced that there are other communication styles that hinder positive communication. Because they hinder the development of this type of communication, and therefore also of empathy and assertiveness. We will now look at some shapes.
Moralistic judgments
Moralistic judgments are an impersonal form of expression. They don’t communicate what the other person is really feeling, just what they cover. These judgments can take various forms, such as criticism, intimidation, insults or cynicism. Rosenberg proposes to replace this behavior with objective observations. He encourages people to avoid judging others. Rather, they should focus on what they feel.
“The report you have given me is a disaster. We can’t give it to anyone like that.” You can change this to “In the report you gave me, there are some ideas that we need to broaden. Try to change them before we give it to the customer.”
Requirements and comparisons with other people
Requests, demands, insults… We use all kinds of means to make sure that someone else understands us. But really, they are threats that imply an accusation or a punishment if we don’t get what we want. These are just other forms of manipulation and aggressive communication.
Denying responsibility
A common example of this type of behavior is when a teen shows his results to his mother and says, “Mom, they suspended me.” The phrase “they suspended me” is a way of putting the blame for his problems on a third party and evading his responsibility.
Another way people deny responsibility is by using impersonal or conditional language. They then refer to their diagnosis, their history or their experiences. The goal is to avoid the consequences of being responsible for what happened.
As you can see, nonviolent communication requires a lot of effort from all parties. But the benefits are well worth the effort.
