Kintsukuroi: My Scars Have Made Me Stronger

Kintsukuroi is a method of healing emotional wounds. It is inspired by the ancient Japanese art of the same name. This technique is used to restore pottery objects. Kintsukuroi’s secret is not in hiding the cracks. But this method, on the contrary, is going to decorate the scars with gold and silver.

Wounds must heal first. Only then do the scars appear. Because of our behavior we often do not allow this.

In the beginning we succumb to those things that relieve our pain. But in the long run, we prevent our injuries from healing. We want to heal other people’s wounds too quickly. We don’t give them the chance to form scars.

So in this article we want to talk about a process by which the scar forms. It starts with the recognition of suffering…

Don’t minimize my pain

Stop telling me it’s not that important. Don’t tell me there are people who have it worse than me. What do you know about feelings?

You have no empathy. You minimize my pain and underestimate my worth and maturity. For it is the same maturity that will protect me. It will prevent me from falling into the trap of comforting and complacent self-deception.

I am a brave person. You won’t notice that I’m cheating myself. For I have the audacity to look at my wounds, to cleanse and heal them. I have the audacity to embellish my scars, for they are a sign that I am alive.

They show that I have lived life in an intense way. I am willing to face all kinds of fears in order to continue living to the fullest. At the very least, I assure you I will not give up that resolve to the darkness.

There is pride in my scars. This is partly due to my accepting that the time it took for them to form is an opportunity to learn.

My children will not repeat my pain. My friends will not feel alone and judged. The people I love find in me an example to follow. This example shows them that you don’t have to fear life. Anyone can overcome pain if you only know how.

Have you not suffered too?

Look me in the eye. See my scars. Love has broken me. I have felt the same pain my daughter felt. I have cried over loss. I have cursed this senseless suffering more than once.

I look people in the eye with empathy and compassion. Because I care about what happens to the people close to me, just like you do…

I managed to pick up the pieces of my broken soul. I picked up every shard. I kept anger, resentment and rancor at bay.

After I hit rock bottom, I picked them up and put them back together. It was an assignment that helped me understand what had happened and how I interpreted it.

When you caused your worst injury yourself…

I made an analysis of what happened to me. At the same time, I have tried to free myself from the filters, the false interpretations and deceit. I didn’t want to be chained to the pain any longer. But I had to reopen the wounds that were causing me so much pain so that I could free myself from them.

I thought the injury was already clear, but I was wrong. So I had to clean it. As I did this,  I began to understand what had happened.

Eventually I realized that I was my worst critic. For I had to understand what had happened by looking at it from the point of view of love and compassion.

I looked again at what my wounds meant to me. In my grief I had jumped to conclusions. So I had to review it. It was that same sadness that oppressed my soul.

Kintsukuroi: Connect to Your Emotional Power

I realized I needed to connect with my emotional power. In addition, I had to learn how to analyze people, make decisions and deal with adversity. I learned to take some distance, think in a different way and see things from a constructive point of view.

It was then that I understood that actions and courage are the engines of emotional growth.

Then I analyzed my inner dialogue. I acquired the ability to distinguish between the things that I can change and the things that cannot be changed. This is how I came to accept that I am incapable of fighting titans. But I changed everything that was within my reach.

Finally, I also stopped trying to break down walls. On the contrary, I went looking for doors. Eventually I overcame my fear of the ocean and learned to swim. I no longer cursed the river but used my time to build bridges.

I worked, thought and was brave… Moreover, I began to see that fears can slow me down but not defeat me.

At the end of this entire process, I discovered the beauty reflected in my scars. These emotional scars tell a lot about me and my strength. They speak of my ability to learn from suffering and overcome adversity.

My scars remind me that I am vulnerable and strong at the same time. When I look at them, I don’t see the pain. On the contrary, I see strength and all that I have overcome…

When I look at my scars, I feel stronger, more secure and… maybe even happier…  Maybe this is the secret to being happy?

Kintsukuroi: Turn Your Scars Into Lessons

I’ve decided to share everything I’ve learned. For you don’t have to burn yourself to see that fire can injure you.

I have restored what was normal. I helped other people not to feel strange and alone. On the contrary, they learned to accept that their suffering corresponded to the circumstances they were experiencing at the time. This is something strictly reserved for people who live and love in an intense way.

Today I show off my scars fearlessly, without guilt or shame. Some of the misfortunes I faced were the result of pure chance. But others were a different story.

I have sometimes caused my own suffering without realizing it. It was a result of the decisions I made or chose not to make. Either it was because of the people I didn’t analyze and the expectations I had or the disappointments I experienced.

I want to share my lessons, my scars, my pain

Today I have built a new reality. It is a reality where compassion, empathy and love have eradicated prejudice, stereotypes and lies.

I am part of this new reality. Here I can accept that I have suffered and that my soul has cried. But not a single tear has been shed in vain. Because all my tears along with my scars taught me something I needed to learn.

Thanks to Kintsukuroi, I am a stronger and more confident individual today. Thanks to Kintsukuroi, I am no longer ashamed of my scars, my sensitivity, my fragility and my strength.

Some people believe that Kintsukuroi is an ancient Japanese technique for repairing broken pottery. But they are wrong. Kintsukuroi is much more than a simple technique. It’s an art, the art of healing emotional wounds.