I’m Here For You When You’re Struggling

I’m here for you when you’re having a hard time, with all my attention. I won’t disappear if you suddenly don’t need me anymore. I don’t just listen to you because I feel obligated and I don’t offer you my hand just because I expect the same from you. If you’re going through a rough time, I won’t just tell you what you want to hear, I’ll just tell you the truth.

We’ve all had a friend or family member who needed a shoulder to cry on. It’s not all that hard to offer that shoulder though, is it? It often even seems that it is a lot easier to comfort someone than to be comforted yourself. Yet we may not be doing the right thing, even if we are convinced that we are. We may make mistakes that we are not even aware of, even when the consequences are already beginning to become apparent.

Just listen to what you want to hear, offer half-hearted support, give advice that you would never follow yourself… does this sound familiar to you? Sometimes you may think you are helping, but you are actually doing the opposite. It’s time for you to open your eyes.

If you’re going through a rough time I’ll listen to everything you have to say

Even if you want to lend someone a helping hand, you also have your own problems, which can sometimes prevent you from really listening to the other person. Perhaps most of what the other person has to say sounds ridiculous to you, so you don’t look closely at how he really experiences the things that are happening to him and how he feels about it. If so, then you are making a big mistake because you are not providing good support.

In situations like this, it’s important that you engage all your empathy. Put yourself in the other person. Would you like him to genuinely listen to you? What would you like him to say to you? What could be helpful to you if you were in that situation? The answers to these questions will help you figure out how to be the most helpful yourself in these moments.

While listening, try not to constantly answer with clichés, with words that come out when you don’t know what to say and the silence is stifling.

‘Don’t worry’, ‘it will be fine’, ‘it will all pass again’. These are things people say when they can’t think of anything better. But you know what? It doesn’t matter at all if you don’t know what to say. You can also just listen and ask questions.

You don’t always have to come up with the best advice, the nicest words to offer support. You can also show that you support someone by simply standing by their side, by preventing them from feeling helpless, by listening to them, and by making an effort to understand the problem but not necessarily solving it. want to unload.

Moreover, sometimes doing nothing means doing a lot. A simple hug can sometimes provide much more comfort than chewed-up, empty words. Actions and a listening ear are worth a thousand times more.

The power of a hug

You’re in the pit, but still I’ll be honest

When you’re trying to help someone, don’t tell them how they should behave or what they should do. In most cases, it is much better to tell someone about your own experiences so that the other person feels that they are not alone. When you do this, though, it’s important to be honest.

For example, imagine that you have a friend who is going through a difficult period in his/her relationship. This person has already had a difficult childhood, and all his relationships turned out to be very toxic in the end. As a result, he has developed dependency and attachment problems, which are especially manifested in a relationship. How are you going to help this person?

Perhaps you have experienced something similar yourself, so you decide to share this experience with him. You even give some healthy advice about how nice it can be to be single, to be out of a relationship for a while, to have more time to do fun things with friends to distract yourself and see that it is completely possible to to be happy without a partner… but, do you stick to what you say?

Often people give very good advice, but they actually do the complete opposite of what they advise, or maybe there is a price attached to the advice that the person who needs the advice can’t afford at the moment. If you come up with a suggestion, make sure it won’t cause more frustration.

It’s also not good to just tell someone what they want to hear. He’s going through a rough time, but he won’t get well soon if you can’t be honest with him and point out both the good and the bad. This is the only way you can really help. Sometimes constructive criticism is much more positive.

It’s not easy to make others feel better, is it? It requires a strong commitment, a lot of attention and an unconditional long-term support with no room for lies. All of this can help ease the pain or shed new light on the situation when your friend or family member needs it more than ever.

Five quotes to help you in difficult times