Forms Of Psychological Manipulation That You Can Be A Victim Of

They are in places we often visit. It could be your boss, your upstairs neighbor, a colleague, a customer, a distant relative, a friend etc. We are talking about people who have mastered certain forms of psychological manipulation perfectly and use them to confuse us.

Although they are close to us, it is not easy to notice these people. Their particularities and personality traits are not striking. No one wears a mark on their forehead warning that they are a narcissist or sociopath. So, how can we avoid these people anyway?

Why me?

These types of people feed on the pain of others. Therefore, it is not that you are weaker, more vulnerable or more special, but you are simply a victim to them. Another.

We have all experienced guilt or mistrust after certain situations in which we have been involved. And the worst part is to feel this without knowing how or why. But it is certain that the consequences affect us, they undermine our morale, they complicate our lives and they increase our insecurities. How do they do this without us being barely aware of it?

What do manipulative people want?

In general, there are many types of manipulative people: sociopaths, narcissists, liars, or the so-called psychological vampires. And discovering these people is more of a practical than a theoretical matter. So if you have ever been a victim of such a person, it will be easier for you to recognize a manipulative person.

Yet we can say that the goals of manipulative people are very clear and goal-oriented, and that they follow a certain pattern. Some of these are:

• Destroying your willpower : They try to sow doubt and try to keep you under their care.

• Destroying your self-confidence : They criticize everything you do or have done. They are not constructive, they are just trying to reveal flaws.
• Passive-Aggressive Revenge : They punish you with their ignorance. When you need them, they drop you; all you have to do is ask them and they will drop you like a brick without ever speaking to you again.
• Twisting reality : They enjoy confusing people and creating discussions and misunderstandings between others. After provoking an argument, they keep to one side and entertain themselves with others who are arguing.

Learn to avoid psychological manipulation

The consequences of psychological manipulation can leave deep scars in each of us. Therefore, it is necessary to know which forms of psychological manipulation are most commonly used. The goal is to learn to get ahead of manipulative people and not become their puppets.

Concerned people often laugh at our opinion, blame us or make us feel guilty, they attack subtly, they question us, they put off what doesn’t interest them, they feel sorry for themselves, they deny truths… All they need to keep the situation under control. But, what manipulation techniques do they use to achieve this?

gaslighting

This is one of the most insidious forms of psychological manipulation. ‘That never happened’, ‘You made that up’ or ‘Have you gone mad?’ Those are some of the expressions they use to distort and confuse your sense of reality, leading you to believe that something hasn’t happened.

This leaves victims with an extreme sense of fear and confusion, to the extent that they no longer trust in themselves, nor in their own memory, perception or judgment.

Projection

A manipulative person transfers his negative qualities to the other person, or transfers the responsibility for his behavior to someone else. Narcissists and psychopaths use this in an exaggerated way, affirming that the evil that surrounds them is not their fault, but yours.

Meaningless conversations

Ten minutes. That’s the time you probably need to end the conversation. Manipulative people talk nonsense, give illogical explanations, put up smoke screens, recount events that happened long ago…

They are just fiddling. They hold monologues and try to captivate you with their talk. A tip? Cut off the call as soon as you can. And if you can do this after 5 minutes, all the better. Your mind will thank you for it.

Generalizations and Disqualifications

They make general, vague and unclear statements. They may seem intellectual, but in reality they are vague. Their conclusions are too general; their aim is to look down on you and scorn your views.

For example: ‘You always want to be right’, ‘You find everything annoying’, ‘You never agree with me’. Stay calm. You can handle it with irony, with a simple “thank you,” or by simply ignoring something and saying, “I think you’re a little upset, we’ll talk about it later.”

nonsense

Remember, they are trying to undermine your morale and make you rethink what you believe in. They can put words in your mouth that you didn’t say, they will make you think they are capable of reading your mind. But no, we’re dealing with tricks and shuffling here. You can save yourself from the situation through simulated surrender. You can say that the other person is within their rights to believe in it, but that you do not change your mind. You can also respond to his blackmail with an ‘okay’ or with some laconic sentences.

The most important thing is that you maintain your confidence. They think that’s what they need to destroy in order to control you. Once your confidence is toned down, the task is a lot easier for them.

Friendly disguise

‘Yes but…’. If you’ve just bought a house, they’ll tell you it’s a shame you don’t have one by the beach yet; if you’ve dressed up really nicely, they’ll point out that other earrings would have looked better… When you’ve just finished a flawless report, they’ll pay attention to the staple that isn’t secure.

But don’t be influenced, you know your worth! Your achievements and virtues are worth far more than their manipulation techniques. Don’t give them credibility and find yourself among people who spend more time emphasizing what is good and encouraging you; those who compliment you when the time comes and express constructive rather than destructive criticism.

Resist the tantrum

When you resist manipulative people, they often become enraged in seconds, especially if you don’t play their game : their tolerance for frustration is usually not very high. They may start to say weird things, even insult you and refer to you with derogatory and belittling comments. It is the fruit of their own distrust.

These are the most subtle and common forms of psychological manipulation that these people use to humiliate you. Control your emotions and keep your cool: that’s the only way to escape their control. If you don’t give in, they get tired and eventually look for another victim. Keeping toxic people at bay makes life a lot more fun.